Waleed J. Iskandar
(1967-2001)
"Wherever he was, that became the best place in the world to be"
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You can shed tears that he is gone, Or you can smile because he has lived. You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back, Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left. Your heart can be empty because you can't see him, Or you can be full of the love that you shared. You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday. You can remember him and only that he is gone, Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on. You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back, Or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on. ( By David Harkins, Silloth, Cumbria, UK ) (November 28, 2002) |
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A dear family of ours who lives in London have created a ceramic plate in memory of our son, Waleed.  We thank the artist, Dr. Fatima, and pray for the Almighty to guard her and her family safely. (December 01, 2002) |
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O Lord, I have one request from you for the coming Holidays. Give me a special gift. Let me see Waleed in my dreams ........ (December 03, 2002) |
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I received an early Christmas gift from a classmate of Waleed in Stanford. " Where did all the tears go? I wish grief could be poured out all at once, in one gigantic waterfall. Instead we’re left with a numbness and trickles of reminders that hit us in the silence in unexpected and untimely moments that you are forever gone, and then the tears flow. But you wouldn’t want to be remembered so, that image of how you died, a continual reminder replayed in our media, sadness whenever I hear “America the Beautiful.” For if I were to keep one snapshot of you, it would be of you reclining, yes, reclining in those upright seats in that auditorium never mind the professor standing in front with his prim bow tie. Looking relaxed as if you were ready to take a nap, with lazy confidence and that twinkle in your eyes. Your faith was contagious. Those who knew you believed in something bigger than ourselves. Being with you didn’t allow for any other possibility. You made us believe. You made me believe. Back then, I was preoccupied with getting through silly accounting trifles. Years later, you would make me believe in something grander, That we are all connected even in our deaths. Waking me up in the middle of the night, “Send that letter to my dad, send it to him now.” How could I say “no” to that? It was only afterwards that I’d discover it was your birthday, A birthday I never knew nor celebrated with you. And therein I found my ultimate affirmation of faith. Yes, I’ll keep checking on your dad. I’m honoring his request, no, demand, to write this. I’ll promise to keep faith, To dream big To not be so afraid And when fears do overwhelm me, To remember that image of you nudging me gently With your grand contagious smile. But now you have to honor my request. Now I’m demanding, Dammit! Show that smile of yours in your father’s dreams. Set him free to live in the possibility That you are very much alive And very much with him. That more than anyone, you most of all, want him to keep on living To recover that Iskandar twinkle in his eyes, The eyes of a proud father, To see the joy in your nieces and nephews And most of all, to find comfort in the arms of your mother. That even in the midst of all this rubble and flowing tears, Make us believe Make him believe That life is worth living If not for his sake, for yours. Remember that serenade for Anna Marie? You and the boys all dressed up. Birthday candles lit up in the darkness of the Quad. Next time I get a picture from your dad I want to see a sparkle of that same joy Back in your father’s eyes. Candles of hope lit one at a time. That’s a promise you can keep for me." (December 07, 2002) |
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Today, I re-read the poem "I am free" written by Linda Jo Jackson ... Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free, I'm following paths God made for me I took his hand, I heard him call Then turned, and bid farewell to all. I could not stay another day To laugh, to love, to sing, to play Tasks left undone must stay that way I found my peace ... at close of play. And if my parting left a void Then fill it with remembered joy A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss Ah yes, these things I too will miss. Be not burdened... deep with sorrow I wish you sunshine of tomorrow My life's been full I've savored much Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch. Perhaps my time seemed all too brief Don't lengthen it now with grief Lift up your heart and share with me, God wants me now ... He set me free ... (December 19, 2002) |
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She was happy this morning. She saw you in her dream. You came to spend Christmas with us, as you have done every year. You were the lively smiling and loving son. You went from one room to the other looking for what is new in the house. You made her day .... She took it as your Christmas present to her for this year. (December 22, 2002) |
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It is our second Christmas since you have left us. This year, we lighted a Christmas tree in your Garden. We have the nativity scene in front of your portrait. We will pray for you as we do every single day. Last Christmas, like this time, we were not accepting your loss. This year we got to accept it. We are teaching ourselves how to live with it. You will be missed very much ... (December 24, 2002) |
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